#258 | March Q&A: Implants & Breastfeeding, Giving Birth Advice, Ultrasounds, Newborn Transition in Waterbirthing, Posterior Babies, Family Boundaries

We are back with the March Q&A episode with Cynthia & Trisha.  We kick off today's episode with an unbelievable, once-in-a-lifetime story of an OB who holds off a mother's pushing to tie a bow in the baby's hair before being born! Next, we get into our questions beginning with a mother who wants to offer important birth advice to her friend's daughter but doesn't know if it is her place or how to not overstep boundaries. Also, what questions to ask at a late third-trimester ultrasound to best avoid unnecessary interventions? Then, Barbara Harper of Waterbirth International answers the question of why it takes a baby longer to "come to" after a water birth. Another mother inquires about how much her energy and anxieties can influence her baby's arrival--is her stress causing her baby to be born "late?" 

In the extended version of today's episode, available on Apple subscriptions or Patreon, we discuss whether or not a pregnancy is easier or harder based on which gender baby you are carrying, how to navigate boundaries with a mother-in-law who has been blatantly disrespectful but planning to help you postpartum. Finally, how do breast implants impact the ability to exclusively breastfeed?  We also have doula Colleen Myatt, a spinning babies instructor, answer a mother's question about posterior babies.

As always, we close with a round of rapid-fire quickies covering tongue ties, evening primrose oil, delivery time for the placenta, setting boundaries, soothing crying babies, and more! 

Thank you for your excellent questions and keep them coming at 802-GET-DOWN or 802-438-3696. For the extended version of today's episode please join our Patreon page or subscribe on Apple podcasts.
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Transcript

Hi, this is Brianna and I am wondering how much of the sunny side up or posterior birth babies do you think has to do with the moms anatomy? And how often do you see it reoccurring in the same mom?

The inverted nipple? Also, I see a lot of women who think they have inverted nipples and they really don't. They just have flatter nipples. But a truly inverted nipple can also make latch really difficult. But a nipple shield is not the answer to that.

Well, what woman wants to turn down this when they're told by their trusted provider, we just want to make sure everything's okay. It sounds like the most rational thing in the world. That is a rare woman who says Now I know everything is finally me alone. Let me go home.

I'm Cynthia Overgard, owner of HypnoBirthing of Connecticut, childbirth advocate and postpartum support specialist. And I'm Trisha Ludwig, certified nurse midwife and international board certified lactation consultant. And this is the Down To Birth Podcast. Childbirth is something we're made to do. But how do we have our safest and most satisfying experience in today's medical culture? Let's dispel the myths and get down to birth.

Hello, hello, Trisha, we got the craziest voice message from someone. Right. And so I I've been so looking Yeah. When I was reviewing the selected questions yesterday, I heard this message and I could not wait to play it for you. I cannot wait to hear your reaction to it. So it's so affordable for you. Do you have anything you want to say? Or anything before we get started? Or should I just play it?

Just go dive in now you got me curious.

You got to hear this. It just was honestly, you'd think we'd be at a point where we're not surprised by things. And then surprising us people keep surprising us then we get a message like this.

Hey, ladies, I just had to share the wildest birth story I think I've ever heard one of my friends just had a baby. I went and brought her some food today. And she told me that when she got through the pushing stage, the nurses as they often do, told her hold it in, don't push. We got to get the doctor here. So he had an epidural. So she stopped pushing, even though Shepley should not have. So the doctor takes her time takes the doctor about 10 minutes or so 20 minutes almost to get up there. And she of course is really wanting to push this baby out. So the doctor walks in and tells her Hey, don't push yet I have to tie the bow. And my friend first time mom she thinks it might be some kind of medical jargon. She doesn't know like what it is. She's like I didn't even want to know I was just like, let her do her thing. So then another 10 minutes go by and my friends like what's going on? Can I push yet? And the doctor tells her no, I'm still trying to tie this though your baby doesn't have that much hair. This doctor brought a bow like a small bow that you abide across or to tie into this baby's hair. Like as she's being born so she could be born with a bow. And my friend finally goes I'm gonna push and started pushing but the doctor had got the bow tied onto the baby's head as the baby was crowning, still in this mother's vagina, and literally was born with a bow. Have you ever heard of this? That this is just insane to me? I told her like, I would have lost my absolute mind. And yeah, so I would love to hear your thoughts on this. If this is something you've ever heard of being done. She did say it was a friend. Mother that was the her OB so like she knew her. But this is apparently a thing this OB does. So yeah, very weird. Thanks, ladies for all you do.

Oh, my God. Oh, you could have given me 1000 guesses and I would never have guessed that. I have never ever ever heard of this. What is going through this doctor said I mean what do you think? They mean? She's absolutely insane. The only thing I can think is like she wants to become known as like the the doctor with the cute hair bow and the baby's hair or something like...

And it's not okay. That's crazy. It's literally crazy.

I I have so many questions. Like what?

My first question is, was it a girl?

Honestly, I don't want no maybe not.

Doesn't matter. What are your questions? No, I'm kidding. Of course gun went off questions.

Why? Just why? There you go. There she is. I was waiting for you to react.

What possible reason?

Because Trisha, it's cute and stylish. Why would anyone not? I don't want anyone's hair. It's not either. Well, maybe you start, maybe it shows that the doctor really cares. No, she made her hold back her pushing.

But imagine how cute that crowding photo was.

Nobody cares about cute crowding photos. That is not the cute photo isn't the one to sharing. That was her head. That's not it. That's true. Yeah.

So then what else? What other reasons could she have?

She must tell there's one reason and it's that she's crazy. First of all, it's abusive to ask a woman not to push when the baby is coming. Like that's the first part of crazy, but the second part is wait. 10 minutes later, she's like working on a bow. You'd think by now she would have learned by medical school and after her after being an intern and a resident you think by now she could tie a good bow? Surely they practiced like that? They don't. I cannot believe this story. I've seen wonders. I want to know what the mother I want to know what the mother's reaction was, I would have been like, get your friggin hands out of me. Now.

I'll mean, if you have a crazy person,

I think it would have kicked her. You. I mean, it's, it's, it's truly unbelievable. The Things Women can't even prepare for because there's so they're such anomalies. They're so crazy. I want to dare everyone listening to this episode. Please try to top that story. The goal is to surprise Trisha. And if you make her laugh, if you make her laugh, bonus points, she's a tough laugh. It's gotta be good. All right, time to jump into our questions, then shall we get serious now?

I guess we have to just tell more jokes.

Like, well, please. Well, please do. We do have two guest responders answering two of our questions today. I think one is in the extended version. But we have Barbara Harper, which is always so great. And we have Colleen might a beautiful birth and beyond answering the question about positioning. So those are coming up in this episode. But let's get started on the first question now.

Hi, my name is Kelly. And I've loved your podcast since my daughter told me about it when she became pregnant. partly thanks to both you both of you and your information. She had a beautiful home birth. I continue to listen to your show every week. My question is, I have a good friend whose daughter is pregnant. And I want to suggest your podcast to the daughter. I know my friend's daughter, but not well. And my friend is reluctant to make any recommendations to her daughter about how to approach her birth experience. And I certainly don't want to step on any toes. But after listening to all your episodes, most importantly, the last one with Katie sphinx which broke my heart. It's actually been keeping me awake at night thinking that my friend's daughter might go unwittingly into a hospital birth without knowing her rights or being educated about its risks. So what do you recommend is the best approach for this if you think it's okay to reach out to my friend's daughter, what episodes would you recommend such a person start off with? Thank you so much for all you do love the books.

Trisha we have a few resident grandmothers who listen to our podcast, as you know, and Kelly Joe is one of them. She's awesome, longtime follower, very, very high engagement with her on Instagram. So she's very loyal. She's She's wonderful. And maybe one day we'll we'll convince her to come on the show like we got Lee reversi to come on the show a few months ago. This is interesting, and we never got this question before. But my clients talk to me about this all the time, when you become very informed about anything in life, such as birth, childbirth, and pregnancy, or anything else. Anything else, you know, nutrition or anything else, you really know a lot about clean living or anything like that. It becomes difficult to know when to speak to encourage or educate the people that you care about that you encounter or you have in your life as opposed to when to be quiet and to live in that fear of stepping on toes. as passionate as I am about my work. I am quite reserved when I let's say speak to a pregnant woman at a farmers market or I'm chatting with someone. I'm pretty reserved, because I don't know I have kind of a deep belief that people find the information they need to find in the world. But then again, sometimes we find that through others. So my suggestion for Kelly she cares a lot about her friend's daughter. I think she can easily recommend a podcast as being fun to listen to. I learned a lot you know birth is changing through the generations. And so the way you guys are giving birth is different how from how your mom and I gave birth. And you can recommend some episodes, I would say if you are willing, you can do one of two things. I would say start with our trilogy, red flags and your first, second and third trimesters. So that's episode 118 124 and 129. Or find a really cool birth story, you know, like Jessica's footling breech with the Amish midwives, or Reina mustards, twin births, where she told the provider to get the heck away from her or there's like a couple dozen really very inspiring birth stories you could recommend instead, or our recent live stream where we discussed how to make a hospital birth more like home. And we have an earlier one to that how to have a physiologic birth in the hospital, sort of a similar concept. But I think it's, I agree with you completely. I'm sort of, you know, if somebody doesn't ask, don't tell, kind of thing, you're not going to just put it in their face, unless it's your own family member, maybe, then you would, I would. But yes, introducing them to the good starting place, a good resource that will kind of pique their curiosity. And then they are, it's up to them at that point of how much further they want to explore it and how deep they want to go. And it's there for them if they want to go deeper, but it's up to them.

I remember a conversation I had with a chiropractor many years ago. And, and he was saying, like, oh, like I just see people driving and they're all bent forward. Their shoulders are like this, and their heads are like this. And I just thought, we all go through this no matter what we're really informed, and we go through the world wishing we could help everyone fix everyone inform everyone. And we just have to live with the discomfort that we're in a minority. And you know, just tread carefully. Your relationship with her is obviously something where you I mean, it depends on the woman, there's some where you could boldly make a recommendation and others where you just have to tread a little more carefully, because what you don't want to do is cause her distress. And depending on who she is, we don't want her to end up giving birth and feeling like she disappointed you or she didn't birth the way you thought she should have. And that's why it's delicate. But yeah, Trisha, if it's a family member, or someone you like you're willing to take the risk with some people, you can handle them getting a little bit like crossed in the interest of sincerely, dramatically improving their lives as far as you believe you will. So very lovely question from a lovely woman. Hopefully, that's a satisfactory response for her.

I think you give a good starting place.

Hi, my name is que I am currently in Gladstone, Virginia. Today, I just hit my 41 week mark, and my midwife is requesting that I get an ultrasound scheduled for next week. And I'm wondering, I've listened to the show for a little bit. I'm wondering just what kind of questions I need to ask, make sure that they don't escalate and intervene, or what to look out for. My last ultrasound was around the five month mark. I don't know exactly. When but everything was good. The placenta looked good brains, fine. Everything was there. And since I've gone over, more and more, moms and women, nurses have been asking if I'm going to be induced, which is what I don't want, and what the doctor saying, what is the midwife going to do that the doctor can't do for you and why? Why not induction so I'm just wondering what questions I can keep asking them to make sure that they use fine. And what to look out for an ultrasound if anything does happen. Baby's still kicking. She's still moving. She still feels good. I don't I don't have any high risk pre eclampsia, no high blood pressure, no diabetes, I declined the group B strep tests because it just wasn't what my husband and I wanted and everything is fine. Just a week over. Thank you.

It's interesting that women look for a reason to turn down an ultrasound. But what they really need is a reason to get an ultrasound in late pregnancy. And it seems like if she had to answer that question, it seems like she thinks that the answer is let's just make sure everything is fine. But the truth is, and the fact of the matter is, everything looks perfect to date. And ultrasound has never been shown to make birth safer. It hasn't been shown to make low risk women safer. But what can happen is you can go open a can of worms, what can happen is they can suddenly tell you the baby is too big or the baby is too small or Are you have low fluid, or you potentially have too much fluid. So what often happens from these casual ultrasounds because it's so great to go look at the baby. So most women are very easy cell, they walk away bearing the pressure of induction, if not a scheduled C section. And we know this statistically, we know this from actual research of 10s of 1000s of women, that this is what happens. So, you know, I hate I hate to say this, because no one wants to hear it. But we have to just sometimes be totally rational, there is no way to guarantee safety. We can't do anything to guarantee safety. But what we do know for this woman is everything looks perfect. So all she can do is go back to trust and wait and do what every one of her ancestors did. They that's that's, that's my position on it. Because we know for a fact that women are pressured into scheduled C sections or induction when they go for these at very high rates, when they go for these late pregnancy, ultrasounds without better outcomes actually with worse outcomes. We know that for a fact for meta analysis. So what more information do we need than that?

Well, everybody is always looking for that one baby who might have a problem that they missed. And there's an unfortunate consequence of that. And that is highly, highly unlikely in a normal ly progressing healthy, low risk pregnancy, just as you said. And the risk of intervention in a late in a late third trimester ultrasound is way higher than the risk of anything else. And those interventions lead to more difficult outcomes. So I think we can always go back to the acronym. It's, I say it a lot, but it's so important. The the acronym, starting with, what are the benefits, the brain acronyms? Starting with the benefits? What? What are the benefits? What are the risks? What are my alternatives? What does my intuition tell me? And what happens if I do nothing?

But if she asks that, and says, What are the risks, they will definitely tell her there are no risks to ultrasound, even though you and I did a live stream on and we went to what there are, but debatable risks actually are about ultrasound, especially in early pregnancy, not later. But there's no way they're going to tell her there's a risk that they're gonna end up pressuring her into induction can ask what, which is a high risk, she can ask what the risk of not getting the ultrasound is?

Well, right. And then I can we know she's going to hear rhetoric response, there is no actual risk of not getting the ultrasound, there is no actual risk of nanogels. Right? They'll say, right there. We're gonna do they're gonna say, right, they're gonna give her rhetoric to scare her. So so to me is the answer, because they're not going to give you a good reason. So if you go through those questions, and you feel that you have been informed, and they can't give you a solid reason why you need it, then you don't need it.

Well, what woman wants to turn down this when they're told by their trusted provider, we just want to make sure everything's okay. It sounds like the most rational thing in the world. What kind of woman is going to say, and by the way, we just met one who said, I know everything is okay. I don't need to do that. But that is a rare woman. We just heard a story like that. That is a rare woman who says Now I know everything is finally me alone. Let me go home. That's not common for a woman to say, I know, everything's fine. Leave me alone. It's normal to say, I agree. Let's make sure everything is fine. But in fact, that again, research is showing otherwise,

we have to have reason to intervene. So if you just go back to what is the reason that I need this ultrasound, what is the indication that I need this. And if they can give you a really good reason, then maybe you decide to do it, but they're probably not going to be able to give that to you because they're simply saying we just want to check that things are okay. And that's not a medical indication.

But there can be potential good reasons for it, or at least legitimate reasons for it. But Trisha, how many birth stories when we do birth story processing sessions, how often the story is begin with? Okay, so I was this many weeks pregnant, and I went for an ultrasound. And thus begins the birth store. Her question is not in labor. Her question is the question that we could get a 1,000th of a day, the same question. This is everybody's situation. It's every woman ends up in this situation. And when you hear it now, and you're not that woman, it's really easy to think Yeah, yeah, I agree. You guys are you know, right. I'm right on board with you. And then when you're 39 weeks pregnant, and you're in that situation, it becomes a lot harder to say no, it becomes a lot harder to decline the intervention. We are we are influenced to believe that we are making the wrong choice through those subtle coercive tactics that way that the provider communicates the pulling the dead baby card as we didn't want to say before, but now I said it that puts women in a really vulnerable, difficult position.

I think what I would do is, if I were really conflicted as this mom probably is, I think I would honestly just go home and close my eyes and get really quiet and wait, wait, wait until my thinking mind gets still and quiet, and place my hand on my belly and just like try to connect with the baby. And I think I would ask, do you need me to check on you? Is there something you need? For me? I think I would just really ask, because whatever happens, in the end, you're going to want to trust that you made the decision coming from your own intuition that you took responsibility for your own decision, whatever you did, and that you received a response somehow, that yes, I need to go check. It's the right thing to do or No, everything is perfect. And let me be that just, you know, it might sound silly, but your intuition is so good. And we so rarely do get quiet. And we so rarely do ask. And it's not like you're going to hear a voice answering the question and it's not. But just feel what your instinct tells you feel if you have a pull to making the appointment, feel if you feel a protection building up, and you want to put a little wall around you and your baby, just feel what responses come and feel, try to feel what you felt in the moment when they said that to you. Because I think once the mind gets involved, it's can be a lot harder to go tap back into that intuition. Because now we have the thinking mind, you know, we go home, and we're thinking and we've somebody's planted the seed of anxiety, and it's very difficult to differentiate between fear and intuition. This is like my greatest challenge with intuition. Fear is not intuition. People often think like, you know, they have these fearful thoughts, and they think it was their intuition, guiding them. It's not, that's your fear. But in that moment, it's so loud, so loud fear so much louder. Intuition is. It's not loud intuition. It's like it's soft, and it's not anxious. It's not anxious. It's soft. It's subtle, but it's damn clear. It's just like it is that deeper inner knowing when all the thoughts are quiet. And in that moment, when the first time the provider mentioned that to her that kind of gut feeling that you get like, back off, buddy, like I'm fine. That's your intuition right there. Like that's real. Monique hmm. Yeah. All right. It's much easier said than done all the thing completely and there, and there's no problem with going and doing it. So if you do go get that ultrasound, just go in informed, prepare for what you will say or ask or do if and when they do say the baby is too big or the baby is too small, or you have too little fluid, prepare for those outcomes because they are likely.

Hi, Cynthia, and Trisha, thank you so much for everything you do. I've been super enjoying your podcast. I am a first time about me, Mom, I'm 40 weeks and three days. My question has to do with the perhaps any statistics on whether or not baby sends out the signal based on mom's own personal mind, body and spirit. More specifically, if I'm experiencing a little bit more anxiety, going into labor, and just not knowing when he's gonna come is that has anything to do with his prolonged signaling that he's ready to come out. I hope that makes sense. Thank you for everything you guys do. And I look forward to hearing my questions as I'm here.

Every month when we do this, I feel bad about all the women who call right at the end of pregnancy, knowing that this episode is likely to come out after so I just want everyone to know just you can contact us you can book 30 minutes with us. If it really is urgent, then you can reach out to us and you can have private time with us and help us answer your questions. Otherwise, if you're just curious to hear what we'll say, and you want to cross your fingers to see if we got our response out before you have your baby, then go for it. But thank you for submitting the questions regardless because it does benefit other women but I just want everyone to know that there is another plan if it genuinely feels urgent, I just feel bad if they're banking on getting the answer, you know, within a week or two, it's just not going to always be yes. So but our our live streams on Patreon we have the monthly q&a to help bridge the gap between you we have that too between the q&a is on the podcast so you can come on and you can ask your question live. Yeah, they can do that too. Yep. Okay, um, so it sounds like she's asking like can her anxiety basically delay or prolong the onset of labor? It can but remember, whatever is in your body must come out and nature has a way of overriding that but yes, stress does bring some tightness to the cervix. It It is more likely that women go into labor in the middle of the night. Many women do more than a third. So we sleep for about a third of our days. And more than a third of women apparently go into labor in the middle of the night, presumably because they're more relaxed. And they're not consciously thinking, Trisha, do you know the stats on that? I've heard it's around 40 or 40 plus percent, but I don't really know if that's, that sounds certain. Yeah. So yeah, it can play a role. But now, just because I said that don't let that bring you more anxiety, just just just trust the baby is coming and enjoy these last few days. Because they're precious days, I think it's important to know that no amount of anxiety is going to keep you from giving birth, it's going to happen at some point. But yes, the initiation of labor is a delicate balance between stress hormones, and oxytocin. And this is part of the reason that women go into labor at night, as you said, All the kids are taken care of and the kids are in bed and the daily chores are done, and the body can relax. And those stress hormones can settle down. And oxytocin levels can rise. And you will hear stories all the time of women who wake up and early in the morning, they're sort of in labor, and then the busyness of the day kicks in the labor fades away, and then it comes back at night. That's all because you have this interplay in the brain between oxytocin and catecholamines. And it's like a seesaw. Seesaw action, and then eventually, the oxytocin rises above and the stress hormones settle down. And we don't see them again until the end of labor. So just a few pointers for her would be simply to take some time, each day to sit down and do relaxing activities, start some yoga, do some meditation, take calming baths, take walks, anything to kind of get out of that thinking mind, and allow those anxious thoughts to go away to settle down, let the body takeover.

Endorphins, get everything going. So anything you do to feel relaxed and happy. Always, it's gonna feel but you're just be happier. Let's remember that any day you do anything to make you feel happier is a better day. It's just general life advice, but your baby will come no matter what, no matter what, enough women throughout history have tried to stop it. No doubt.

I had a home birth with my first child two years ago, and my second baby who I'm dealing with next month, I really my goal was to have a water birth, I really wanted to have another home birth. Unfortunately, we did find out she was diagnosed with a heart defect that our 20 week anatomy scan, called the VSD, ventricular septal defect. And so it's basically a hole in the heart. It's a moderate to large size. After a lot of talking with our home birth midwife and everything praying, we decided to have a hospital birth this time around, which is super hard for me, especially wanting to give birth in the water, which this hospital mental hospitals in the area will, quote unquote, allow. I did ask my home birth midwife, what happens if I decide you know, I'm laboring in the water, and I don't want to get out to labor. And her reaction was basically Well, I don't know if I would do that. Because her personal experience was that babies born in water kind of take a little bit longer to quote unquote, come to, as she described. I've been listening to your episodes with Barbara Harper. And I guess I don't really quite understand like, where she's getting that information. And, and Barbara Harper seems to just be like, kind of on the opposite end of the spectrum, in terms of, you know, how babies do with water births. So if you have any clarity on that, if Barbara Harper has anything to say on you know, babies with heart defects being born in water, I know that's a lot to reach out to her. But you know, if you guys just have anything you can give me in terms of advice on like, you know, if I do not get out of that water, is that baby really going to have a harder time coming to. So anyways, thank you so much for what you do. Thank you for just continuing to be such a light. Well, I just want to say first of all, that Barbara harbor is on the right end of the spectrum, not the other end. She on the right of this. That's right. Absolutely. If she wants to give birth in the water, yes, the hospital is going to put up a fit about it, but just do what you need to do. They would literally have to physically remove you. You can stay in the water, babies Transition just fine. Born in the water, they, Barbara, I'm sure it's gonna explain all that in her explanation. But I also just wanted to make the comment that these type of heart defects often spontaneously resolved in late pregnancy as well. So she should definitely check on that again, before she firmly committed to hospital birth if she is still feeling that longing to have a home birth.

All right, let's, let's play with Barbara had to say.

Hi, everybody, this is Barbara Harper. Cynthia and Trisha sent me an interesting question that was recorded on down to birth. This Mala who wanted to know if water babies take more time to come to those were the words that she used, that her midwife had told her that. And she specifically asked me to answer that question. So I'm happy to do that. And the simple answer is yes, Water Babies get the stimulation to take their first breath. After a series of physiologic changes within their cardiovascular and respiratory system, the first change that happens is contact with the atmosphere, you experience gravity. And you also experience the presence of nitrogen, our atmosphere is 78% nitrogen. And nitric oxide is only a small part of it. But both of them are basic dilators. And so it sends a signal to the brain that basically says, Welcome, you've made it, you're in a body. And now you have just weep at a time to switch from fetal circulation to newborn circulation. And we need to fill the lungs with blood from the placenta. So do not cut the cord, leave the cord intact, and that baby will be much better. And in a Water Babies case, you want a minimum time of three minutes before you cut the cord. That's minimum. And we'll talk about that on a separate issue. So when you get that signal that says welcome, you're in a body, then the chanson, the heart close, blood cannot go back to the placenta. And the fluids that are in the lungs get pulled out. And we have to have perfusion in the lung bed before ventilation can happen. The bed baby has a literal Head Start head comes out. And the switch begins to happen. By the time the full baby is on the mom's chest. It has switched and it's crying lustily. The water baby and the breech baby both have a delay, because it takes about 22 seconds 20 seconds to an extra 30 seconds for that switch to happen. So yes, the there is a slight slight respiratory delay, that your app cars are judged from the time that the baby comes up out of the water or the time that the head of the breach is born. And that's when the clock starts. So thank you so much for your question. If you if you want to delve deeper, just give me a holler. Send me a DM on at the Barbara Harper. Happy to take your questions. And keep listening to down to birth. Take care. God bless. Bye bye.

All right, thank you, Barbara, as always for coming on the show and giving us your incredibly valuable inputs. And that is a wrap for the regular part of this q&a. For those who are with us in the extended version on Apple subscriptions or on Patreon we've got a few more questions for you coming and for everybody else. We are on two quickies. Okay, quickie number one. How often do complications occur and a physiological unmedicated birth or complications more likely to happen because of interventions? Second part of the question? Yes, they are. It's not a quickie. No, it's not a quickie. But it's easy to answer quickly that yes, complications are more likely to happen because of interventions and how often do complications occur in physiologic and maybe unmedicated birth a lot less often than they do in non physiological birth. The incidence of really rare emergency complications and physiologic birth is actually very small, less than 1%. It's less than 1%. Things like cord prolapse and wow, yeah, emergency type things. Yes. What are your thoughts on that? dose aspirin to prevent eclampsia. They're always changing their recommendations. But yeah, when they when they, when they've done studies on this, they found the relative. First of all, they only recommended it for when a woman has multiple moderate to severe risk factors. I would be a tough sell on the aspirin, it's increasingly recommended for women. And they're changing their position on it all the time to be more supportive of it.

I think the quick answer is that if you don't have a history of preeclampsia, and you don't have risk factors, you don't need it.

I mean, for sure, in that case, I mean, that's almost that's like, that's, that's implying everyone otherwise needs it. Yeah. Well, that would be as what women are being told. Yeah, it's older moms are being told that also everyone can. Yeah, everyone doesn't mean.

Ha. All right. Next one. How risky is it to decline the vitamin K shot?

How risky is it? I believe you and I did a 75 minute class on this on Patreon that's available for everyone if they Yes, very detailed patreon.com/down to birth show slash shop, they can download that event newborn interventions. I believe the risk was what was it one per 11,000? Babies? Yes.

So that's the that's the risk. What are your top three must haves for a homebirth? Besides good support and medical supplies? A barista Chuck's pads?

Good food?

Definitely good food, good food and drink? Coconut water good stuff. Huh? What else?

a heating pad and some baby blankets.

Is it that simple? There's nothing else?

Well for not for eliminating your support team and the medical supplies. Yeah, you need good music, soft lighting. You need your bed double made two sets of sheets on the bed so that you can take off the dirty ones from giving birth and go right into clean ones.

I love that trick. Though Chuck's pads are impressive. They can hold a lot. You need a lot of trucks pads. It's impressive, though. They're very helpful. All right, next. How can you have a positive birth experience in the hospital? You guys seem to only post about the negatives.

Wait a minute, were we only post about negative birth stories in on Instagram?

No, I think I think what they mean is, I think what she means is that we're always talking about the difficulties of hospital birth, the ways your birth can be derailed, which but we've had so many episodes with incredibly positive hospital births and how women did that. So maybe she just needs to listen to more of our birth story episodes. Yes.

And we actually just did a nice livestream on how to have a physiologic or how to have a hospital birth feel more like a home birth, and also the episode about how to have a physiologic birth in the hospital. The thing is that the hospital is designed to the hospital design is going to put you at risk of more intervention. That's That's the whole concept here. But that doesn't mean that you can't have a positive hospital birth experience by any means.

No, um, the vast majority of my clients birth in hospitals. It's just, it's just more to prepare for That's right.

What is the average time a placenta takes to what is the average time a placenta takes for delivery without interventions? I mean, I always heard 15 to 20 minutes, but then Barbara Harper said it's usually on the third contraction postpartum. And is that 15 minutes later?

It depends on how far apart your contractions are. It could be as part of it can be farther apart, right? They can be they can be a few minutes apart. They can be five minutes apart. They can be seven minutes apart. So yeah, it really depends. But the typical threshold for placental delivery time is 30 minutes. But most placentas are born sooner than that. What are some tips for soothing a crime newborn when they are fed and dry but crying hysterically? Simple breastfeed them. Even if they're hungry, it doesn't matter. Put them back on the breast. If that's not working, just skin to skin on your chest. When all else fails, I also think sitting on a birth ball and bouncing them does the trick every time.

My baby my daughter, my second used to stop crying when Eric would take off his shirt and hold her and put a little blanket around her. I couldn't believe it. It was it was really a reminder that they come into the world knowing both of their parents. It was so precious. When I really tried everything and everything seemed to fail. He would come in and she just like she would just snuggle against him and tuck her little legs up against him and put her cheek down was the cutest thing. And I couldn't believe it. It happened many many times. She just wanted her dad. This precious.

Can you give us a one line boundary to set with family and friends who are telling you their negative birth stories? In HypnoBirthing, we say only happy birth stories, please my baby's listening. You can offer other options.

You could use what would you say he's a variation of my favorite line trying to set boundaries with people that just need a firm boundary which would be good Thank you, but your birth story is none of my business.

I dare anyone to say that I think what I would say, just thinking about, like, what how I would really sincerely communicate. I think I would say, um, would you mind telling me after my baby is born? I think that's kind of loud and clear. And it doesn't it's not too difficult to say I think that's a fair way to assert yourself and it doesn't feel like a more like you're trying to prove a point or I'm not open Welcome to I'm not open to birth story feedback right now. I'm not open to birth story. Or stories right now.

Or you can even say like a joke. Like you know what, tell me after my baby is born. Haha. Hi.

resort to humor that always is good solution. You know, you can say it in a way that's kind of funny. People. They're the worst. Seinfeld says. I love it. They're the worst. If only we could do that in the episode with Liz at Christmas time was that when I brought that up? I have no idea. I don't remember. I feel like I laughed about that with you recently. Okay, next.

What are some signs that I should have my baby evaluated for tongue dye? Lots. Oh, okay. Yeah. Quick. Nipple pain, slow weight gain, reflux.

Difficult latch.

There are so many. They can't pronounce the name well. difficulty speaking. So basically, it's all about that they can't latch it's all about the latch is what you're really saying. Right? Everything about breastfeeding is not the latch everything.

I guess that's obvious.

Do you recommend evening primrose oil topically or vaginally?

I agree. Right, right. Topically or vaginally? That's the same thing?

Yeah, no, I think she I think she means orally or vaginally topically and vaginally, that's what we record? Well, it's very hard to think of anything inserted into your vagina and your cervix is quote, topical. I think women have a hard time thinking of that as topical because it's internal. But yes, it's I think she means gastrointestinal Lee orally, versus what you're calling topically, but I don't think women think of it that way. Trisha.

We don't want to apply it to your skin, that's for sure. So no, it's internal to your immune cells at the cervix. And the research shows how highly effective that is an orally not so much no harm done, but not so much.

All right, last one, if you could tell your 20 year old self something, what would it be?

Ah, other than stock tips. I mean, we were asked, in our December we were we were in we were asked this in our um, December episode with Liz where it was like all personal questions only. This was one of the questions then. So I remember what I said then and I'm, I'm feeling the same response. Now. I think I would just tell myself to trust, to trust that, you know, I'm in good hands, that I'll make good decisions that I'll bring the right people into my life that things work out. I don't know. I think we have responsibility to ourselves to trust more that things will work out.

Yeah, I think my answer would be a little bit similar. And we said this also, in the end, the personal episode, just that you life is going to present difficulties and challenges and problems. But if you can see those as opportunities, like a problem is never really a problem. It's it's always an opportunity to grow, learn, evolve, and you always get through it. So not to worry. It just gets better. As you get wiser. It gets better and we do get wiser.

Thank you for joining us at the Down To Birth Show. You can reach us @downtobirthshow on Instagram or email us at Contact@DownToBirthShow.com. All of Cynthia’s classes and Trisha’s breastfeeding services are offered live online, serving women and couples everywhere. Please remember this information is made available to you for educational and informational purposes only. It is in no way a substitute for medical advice. For our full disclaimer visit downtobirthshow.com/disclaimer. Thanks for tuning in, and as always, hear everyone and listen to yourself.